Wednesday, 8 October 2014

The Joys of Mums While On Maternity Leave


There's no home like your mother's home...

So im 38 weeks and 3 days preggers and yesterday was day 1 of my maternity and i promise my mother i will spend the week with her before the inlaws arrive in a week.

Monday morning - Day 1-  I finally get to sleep in as the husband FINALLY sees some sense in taking a bus to the station which means I don't have to get up at 7:50am and waddle outta the home with my big fat belly. Then at 9am i get a knock on the door and its my mum on her morning walk wanting to say hi. I invite her in and she first makes me boiled milk with crushed almonds, butter and sugar and 2 toasts. We then sit and have a catch up and suprise suprise she tells me the TV and skirting boards have dust and gets up and decides to clean them for me. I do tell her not to but mums OCD doesnt wanna hear it so i let her get on with it... Then she tells me to spend the week with her so i tell her ill get changed and come over.

I get to mums and i get the exclusive grandad arm comfy arm chair and a foot stool to put my feet up.... So comfy that i cant even explain! Then strict orders from mon that I must not move! I tell Mum... "im pregnant not disabled! But mum says nooo she knows best so i let it be.

And then it starts...

1pm - Roast chicken, Pilau rice with meat curry... Then 3:30pm tea time - big fat cuppa chai with buttered scones and chocolate biscuits and black forest gatuex... Then 5:30pm some snack time - hot runny halwa - then 7pm - spring roll and a meat somosa with chaat... Then 8:30pm supper time - meat curry and one chapatti... By the time i got home at 9:30pm what can say... Being over the edge is a understatement!! Did i have an uncomfortable night or what!! Vowed never again!!

Day 2 - breakfast at mums - 1 boiled egg, 2 buttered croissants, a slice of almond cake and 2 Viennese swirl biscuits with stove boiled tea. Lunch - cornflour chapatti with freshly crushed chillis and melted butter with daal. Tea time - cuppa coffee and some biscuits to dunk. Then knocked back a litre of pinapple juice in the hope it will bring on labour and not even a twinge! Then finally supper with boiled rice, daal, salad and popadoms!

Day 3 - 2 toasts with a glass of pineapple juice for breakfast and then a macdonalds fillet-o-fish meal with a coke and a hot apple pie.

By this time I'm on my hands and knees and I plead  to my mother "please mum PLEASE gimme a break from food!!"

Mothers hey... Ill call her a FEEDER but theres no love and care like that from your mother...

1 comment:

  1. After all that I can't believe you haven't put weight on anywhere other than the growing bump! Jealous ;p


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